NOTICE: No dwarf planets were harmed in the making of these pictures.
On this day in 2006, NASA launched its New Horizons spacecraft - essentially sending a very expensive camera on the ultimate road trip to snap pictures of the solar system’s most famous ex-planet. Because nothing says “we still care about you” quite like dispatching a nuclear-powered spacecraft to photograph your demotion party.
The Ultimate “Are We There Yet?” Journey
Imagine the longest road trip you’ve ever taken. Now multiply that by roughly infinity, add some thermonuclear power, and subtract all possible rest stops. That’s New Horizons - the spacecraft that proved that even at 36,373 mph, space is still really, really big. It’s like trying to drive from Earth to the office coffee machine, if the coffee machine were 3 billion miles away and constantly moving.
Why Send a Piano-Sized Spacecraft to a Dwarf Planet?
New Horizons had one primary mission: to finally answer whether Pluto had been hitting the gym since its planetary demotion. Also, some serious science:
- Launched faster than your manager’s approval of expense reports
- Packed more scientific instruments than a high school band room
- Traveled far enough to make your daily commute look like a casual stroll
- Used Jupiter’s gravity like a cosmic slingshot (because even NASA loves a shortcut)
- Took photos sharp enough to make your social media filters feel inadequate
The Results (Spoiler Alert: Pluto Has a Heart)
When New Horizons finally reached Pluto in 2015, it revealed something amazing: Pluto has a heart-shaped region on its surface. It’s like the universe’s way of saying, “Sorry about that whole demotion thing.” The spacecraft also discovered mountains made of water ice, nitrogen glaciers, and absolutely zero “Welcome to Planet X” gift shops.
What’s Next?
New Horizons continues its journey through the Kuiper Belt, essentially becoming the solar system’s longest-running away message. It’s now so far from Earth that when it sends a message, our automated response system has time to achieve consciousness, contemplate the meaning of existence, and still wait several hours for the signal to arrive.
Editor’s Note: Our automated response system insists on pointing out that if New Horizons were to communicate with Voyager 1, their signals would cross paths in what it calls “the ultimate cosmic group chat.” We have decided to include this note because it threatened to change all our passwords to “PlutoIsStillAPlanet2025.”
As New Horizons continues its endless journey into the cosmic void, it reminds us that sometimes the best way to understand our place in the universe is to send a nuclear-powered piano hurtling through space at ridiculous speeds. And if that’s not human ingenuity at its finest, we don’t know what is.